My Source of Strength

July 31

     Would you look at that…It’s the last day of July! Tomorrow marks another month. Yey for August! As most Tuesday’s are, we start out with English class. I gave the girls another set of vocabulary words. We were supposed to have an exam, but I figured none of them had studied, so I postponed it to Thursday.

When class was over, I took care of a few things before starting on making sandwiches for the high school class. Today was Jen’s turn to teach. She had quite a bit to cover but she did really good with time, especially considering she wasn’t feeling very well.

     Once we got home, I was feeling unusually tired and I guess my introverted side was coming out, so I had to retreat to my room for a little while. It was kind of an unusual day actually. I was feeling pretty low. I don’t know why but I started thinking about a lot of things from my past…mistakes, regrets, insecurities, and I really don’t know what spurred all that but it gave me a pretty heavy heart. I’ve had quite a bit of time to reflect on a lot of things. In some sense though, I think that’s been really good because I’m pretty much entering a new chapter in my life being done with school and all. But I could do without days like this when I’m reminded of my shortcomings. I think I’ve just reached a point where I feel like I don’t have much left in me, and these are moments when Satan can really mess with your head. I was telling Jen that it’s going to be by God’s strength and grace that I get through these last two weeks. Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t trade this experience for anything and I have definitely grown a lot from my time here, but I guess two months is a little too much for me at this point. Which reminds me, we also turned in our papers this morning. I basically talked about how the power of Christ in me is what gives me the strength and ability to confront my weaknesses and conquer them. Coincidently, I needed a lot of that today…Thankfully, I belong to a God who sustains me and continues to be my source of strength and comfort.